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2 main events coming up in my life. his birthday and her birthday. i want to make it a big one for him and her. you know why? both of them are very special to me. hehe..for him, i''ve already planned. guys, it is confirmed. on the 9th September 2006. and the cake cutting ceremony will be held at 5pm instead of 4pm. so please bring along heaps of presents for him. i am still thinking of what to buy for him. a year old but no teeth and can't walk. slow boy. but he is smart to the maximum. haha. was thinking of getting him clothings but he has quite a lot too. another is to buy him little tikes playhouse. can't decide. i neeeeed help. anyway, we've settled on the cake, food and people. now, just the decorations and stuff. :D alright. next, her birthday. i must make it a happy and grand one. for mine, she did a great jjob and it was my best birthday celebration ever. i can't wait for her birthday to come actually. have to do it 2 weeks in advanced due to the fasting month. i'm glad i took a week's leave. so i can sit and think. think i've been thinking too much and now my head is throbbing. i've not had headache for quite sometime. ouh.. i am so happy. i can't wait to organize this event and celebrate it. but my dear, don't expect a lot because by then i will be working and very tired. now i can surf online 24/7 because of my off days. and.. thank you very much for the macdonald meal. i am so touched. while eating.. i did tear. heehehe. so sweeet. oh, by the way, yesterday i was just clearing some files on my desktop. found some wonderful and creatively picture taken by me. *ya right* i think it would be appropriate if i just post the pictures. good things are meant to be shared. i promised to put up the kl trip pictures too right.. check out ok.. muacks.
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i'm so alone, i'm so lonely. (no, don't talk about alvin.) my head is caught in this maze. i don't want to be in your game anymore. i understand how she feels. assure her and love her just like how you claimed you love me. its weird. utterly weird that you love me. ok, crankles, i know you said that just to please me. you don't have to. because i know you are so into physical appearance. she's pretty but a pity she flirts too, huh? is that why you are doing that to me too? i quit this game. many times, over the phone, i told you. i Q.U.I.T. i don't want to be with you. i want to be with my dearest mokz. at times i wonder if anyone remembers me. sitting in my self sorrow, all alone. my mind seems to play mean games. i have no one to talk to, I pushed them all away. but i don't have anyone else to blame. i'm starting to hear things i don't think are real. i think i hear them talking to me. but i guess i would do anything not to feel. so very lonely. most can't see i hide behind my eyes
i cover my emotions VERY WELL. |
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yes, read on to find more about me.. You're always head cheerleader for your friends' love lives -- have you ever thought about doing the same on your own? It's time to take center stage and tell yourself that whatever you want to happen can happen. Some normally quiet areas of your heart and soul start waking up. Ignoring them won't make them go away -- in fact, it'll have quite the opposite effect. They want to be heard. They need to be heard! So listen. Dwelling on all the so-called mistakes in your love life? Well, take heart -- you're in the present and the future is still unwritten. If you want to take control of your future, study the past -- and learn from it. You're at the center of all the hustle and bustle in your increasingly busy routine. It may start to feel like just that -- routine -- but rest assured that all your actions have meaning and import, even the tiniest ones. Is admiration a solid basis for a relationship? Who cares? It's more than promising for a delightful flirtation. Someone you like and know has the same feelings for you. It's time to exchange some witty repartee. Talent is a remarkable gift, but it's not enough on its own. You also need to have something to say and the conviction that it needs to be said. Being incredibly persistent and stubborn doesn't hurt, either. This connection with you-know-who might be effortless, but the long-term maintenance might mean more of a challenge. You think it's worth the sparks for the heat that you two can generate in the long run. There's a hole in your heart where a certain person used to reside. You can try to distract yourself, but you know you won't feel complete until you find a way to reconcile. Call them up as soon as possible. It's time to toss that 'to-do' list out the window -- along with that must-have list for any potential dates. Scrap all your expectations. Your guidelines are far too narrow. It's time to let the universe drive. Write down all of your ideas until you find a solution. Don't toss any of them -- even the ones you think are stinkers. Who knows? Some of those discards might end up coming in handy later on. Every relationship you've had has taught you something about yourself and how you relate to people. Be proud of all that growth and knowledge you have! Your next romance will be a cinch, honestly. Okay, so another door doesn't always open when the first one closes -- sometimes it's more like a window. But rest assured that the universe finds a new opportunity for you if you can't make use of the first one. Go slowly, especially if it's been a while since you've been in the dating scene. Lay the groundwork. In other words, think about what you want before you plunge into a new situation, okay? You're more sensitive than usual right now, so keep to yourself. Spend some time at a museum appreciating the craft behind the artists' works. Reread an old favorite story or try to write something yourself. Who's behind creating the unrealistic expectations and impossible time lines regarding your romantic life? Hey, remember that old song about how you can't hurry love? Hum it to yourself a few times today. Writing is magical. The empty page is where you start to put together the disparate parts of your life. Once you put it down on paper, you can figure out how all your plans can start to come together. |